Loving on your children

I have never been a 'touchy feely' person and innate in my character is a pretty severe British stiff upper lip. For some reason, beyond my own choice, I find it very hard to show emotions or seem vulnerable in public. It is something that I have felt paralysed by at times because it can be such a hinderance. I guess at the crux of it, it prevents people from seeing the real you: raw, vulnerable and struggling,  just like everyone is from time to time!

It's something I have been quite aware of since having children because I would not wish them to feel the same way. When you become a parent, you often assess your own life thus far and draw on the good points that you would like to pass onto your children, whilst seeking to protect them from struggling with the things you might have in the past.

My children have taught me a lot about being fearless and letting your character show. I think right from the offset in childbirth you have to be fearless even though you are scared. Strange paradox, yes, but true because during my own two labours and births, the overwhelming sense of delivering my children safely suffocated my agony and fear of 'what if!?', allowing me to focus on protecting and loving my children into this world.

Since then, there have been many endearing moments where Noah has needed my love in a public, unapologetic way. It's very based on specific physical actions for him too; he needs me to hold him and shower him in kisses. And it's therefore unsurprising that nothing soothes him the same way as being embraced and spoken to in soft, kind words.

Jonah's need for us as parents is also very similar. From breastfeeding to burping, cradling to singing to him, his need for our love is also, inherently physical.


All these little things work to nudge my character out of its hiding place and little by little, I have seen changes in myself along the way. I was once told that Motherhood will make you confident and I couldn't believe it because it is so against my nature to be outspoken and 'confident' in a worldly manner. Yet, gradually I do see myself changing to meet the needs of my children and family.

The importance of loving on your children must not be taken for granted, even if that means dancing down the highstreet just because your little one wants to hold hands and jump with you! Whilst those sweet little moments will not last forever, the openness you can instill in your children's hearts to want to love those around them will stay with them as they grow and mature. 
Their confidence in you as a parent starts with embracing, kisses and kind words right at the beginning of their lives. I'm convinced these small actions of love will serve to help our children grow in confidence, sure of their parents love for them.

Just a few thoughts from an imperfect and happy mama!
Love Bunty


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